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Adam Corolla - Where Have All The Fellas Gone?
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Adam Corolla - Where Have All The Fellas Gone? - April 11, 2011, 10:25 AM

Interesting read. Sexist as they are, he makes some good points.

Warning: This blog post may offend you. If you don’t own a TV or a ladder, or groom for more than hour each morning, I suggest you report back to the home page. As for the rest of you … ah, who am I kidding? This is probably going to piss you off, too.
Far too many guys in their forties can’t turn a wrench or swing a hammer nowadays. But they have tons of opinions about the new Silver Surfer movie. It’s a sure sign of the pussification of America. What happened?


Forget about actually being a man’s man—guys don’t even bother to lie about being manly anymore. It used to be a fella would at least have enough dignity that when he was driving with the missus and the car wouldn’t start, even though he didn’t know what to look for, he’d say, “Pop the hood.” He’d stand there and stare at the engine for a while, set his cigarette on top of the air cleaner, and yell, “Try it now.” Of course, the engine wouldn’t start, but at least he looked like a man. Now the guy says, “Call AAA. I don’t want to get my cuticles dirty.”


It’s the same thing with fighting. Guys used to have stories where they said, “This son of a bitch spilled a drink on my old lady at the bar, so I got in his face and said, ‘If you’re looking for trouble, you found it. You’re in for a world of hurt.’” Now, dudes tell stories that go, “I honked at a guy and he got out of his car so I called 911. But I got a busy signal, so I locked myself in and hit the OnStar button.”


I get labeled a misogynist all the time. But I’m simply pointing out that men and women are different. Or at least they used to be. We’ve done away with gender roles. As a culture we decided the smaller the chasm between male and female, the more evolved our society would be. But there’s a reason women have cooters and men have peckaroos. We’re different, and that’s a good thing.


Why is it that the same people who beat the “celebrate differences” drum when it comes to cultures refuse to acknowledge the biggest cultural difference on the planet? Men and women. I guarantee you Japanese men, German men, and black men have a lot more in common than your average dude and chick. Let’s face it. Women are better with the kids when they get a boo-boo, but when it comes time to disarm the roadside bomb, that’s where the fellas come in.


I have a theory that I think will put things into perspective. Look at society as a giant X. Women on one bottom leg, men on the other bottom leg. The date: 1950. Women cooked, cleaned, took care of the kids, and mended torn dungarees. Men provided, fixed the car, patched the roof, and warded off intruders with a baseball bat.


Then the ’60s arrived. Each gender moved a little higher up the leg of the X. Women stopped shaving their armpits and men grew their hair out. Women started going to work and men started taking their car to the mechanic.


Now we get into the ’80s. Figure we’re about halfway up the X leg before the cross. Men start applying mousse and eyeliner; women are more worried about having rock-hard abs than they are about their kids.


Now the ’90s. School districts are being sued for girls’ rights to play on boys’ football teams, and being a woman trapped inside of a man’s body is as real a medical diagnosis as Hodgkin’s lymphoma.


In the 2000s, we officially hit the intersection of the X. Men are “metrosexuals” getting mani- pedis while their wives drive a jeep to their job as an NFL sideline reporter. If you go to a store today you can find unisex fragrances. This idea would have never worked in the ’50s. Women’s perfume came in a glass slipper and smelled like baby powder and lilacs; men’s cologne came in a ship or a football and smelled like a pine cone.


I grew up in the ’70s with a steady diet of “the reason girls play with dolls and boys play with trains is because of the Man’s homophobic agenda.” Bullshit. My son loves trains. All boys love trains. They can’t help it—it’s in their blood. It’s amazing that the train wasn’t invented earlier, considering that young boys have been around for millions of years. It’s heroin for them—they go berserk for it.


If you put a boy alone in a room with some Thomas the Tank Engine toys and some Barbies and don’t say a word, I guarantee that he’ll go right for the trains. What were my mom and her angry hippie friends thinking? And why haven’t they apologized?
Adam Carolla is the author of the New York Times bestselling book,
In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks. In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks.
In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks.In Fifty Years We’ll All Be Chicks.
Follow him on Twitter by http://www.twitter.com/adamcarolla



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

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April 11, 2011, 11:41 AM

Personally I think Adam Carolla IS the man that he menitons in the blog that calls AAA.....I really don't see him popping a hood for shit....nor should he. I wouldn't if I had his money.

See thead on starbright and the my little pony cartoons some .net members watched as kids.


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April 11, 2011, 01:56 PM

Women’s perfume came in a glass slipper and smelled like baby powder and lilacs; men’s cologne came in a ship or a football and smelled like a pine cone.






This area is dripping with sissy boys.


"Someone should donkey punch that bitch with a waffle iron then upload the video to World Star Hip Hop" ~.Nets Resident Chivalrous Gentlemen Stillie

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April 11, 2011, 02:06 PM

Just yesterday I had a friend call me asking about the coolant level in his car... The light came on indicating the fluid level was too low. He paid a mechanic ten dollars to do it since he didn't know how to do it himself. Quite sad really...


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April 11, 2011, 02:09 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ericstein81 View Post
Just yesterday I had a friend call me asking about the coolant level in his car... The light came on indicating the fluid level was too low. He paid a mechanic ten dollars to do it since he didn't know how to do it himself. Quite sad really...

He should be kicked in the nuts ten times.


"Someone should donkey punch that bitch with a waffle iron then upload the video to World Star Hip Hop" ~.Nets Resident Chivalrous Gentlemen Stillie

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Gasoline by The Bouncing Souls
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April 11, 2011, 02:12 PM

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Originally Posted by boomchic00 View Post
Women’s perfume came in a glass slipper and smelled like baby powder and lilacs; men’s cologne came in a ship or a football and smelled like a pine cone.




This area is dripping with sissy boys.
To that end, I saw this in my cousin's bathroom the other weekend on "his" side of the sink.


I asked if it was his finance's, and he says "No, it's mens cologne. Jean Paul Gautier....."

I laugh and say that's the gayest looking bottle of Mens anything I've ever seen and remark how we use to go Genovese Drugstore when were were younger and get stuff like Canoe or Old Spice. Or the Farenheit imitation knock-off.



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

- Nicolo Machiavelli 1469-1527

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April 11, 2011, 02:16 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Heist View Post
To that end, I saw this in my cousin's bathroom the other weekend on "his" side of the sink.


I asked if it was his finance's, and he says "No, it's mens cologne. Jean Paul Gautier....."

I laugh and say that's the gayest looking bottle of Mens anything I've ever seen and remark how we use to go Genovese Drugstore when were were younger and get stuff like Canoe or Old Spice. Or the Farenheit imitation knock-off.
Laugh all you want, that's Le Male and it smells uber yummy I wear the female verison. Plus, what do you expect from a gay French designer?


"Someone should donkey punch that bitch with a waffle iron then upload the video to World Star Hip Hop" ~.Nets Resident Chivalrous Gentlemen Stillie

RIP KATIE RIP BAMBAM RIP VEGA
Gasoline by The Bouncing Souls
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOxc2cM75NI


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April 11, 2011, 02:22 PM

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Originally Posted by boomchic00 View Post
He should be kicked in the nuts ten times.
He should and I will the next time i see him. He just happens to live on the other coast though.

^
and at my own admittance, I have to confess I have jean paul gautier. I get stopped by girls a lot who wanna know what it is.


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April 11, 2011, 02:23 PM

Bunch of slack jawed rectum-punching metrosexuals who are scared to get a little dirty or drink cheap beer. That's ok, I know who to prey upon when we go beyond Thunderdome.


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April 11, 2011, 02:25 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ericstein81 View Post
He should and I will the next time i see him. He just happens to live on the other coast though.

^
and at my own admittance, I have to confess I have jean paul gautier. I get stopped by girls a lot who wanna know what it is.
Tell him to punch himself in the nuts then start at least reading a basic mechanics book

Smart chicks!


"Someone should donkey punch that bitch with a waffle iron then upload the video to World Star Hip Hop" ~.Nets Resident Chivalrous Gentlemen Stillie

RIP KATIE RIP BAMBAM RIP VEGA
Gasoline by The Bouncing Souls
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOxc2cM75NI


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April 11, 2011, 02:26 PM

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Bunch of slack jawed rectum-punching metrosexuals who are scared to get a little dirty or drink cheap beer. That's ok, I know who to prey upon when we go beyond Thunderdome.
2 men enter...1 man leave.


"Someone should donkey punch that bitch with a waffle iron then upload the video to World Star Hip Hop" ~.Nets Resident Chivalrous Gentlemen Stillie

RIP KATIE RIP BAMBAM RIP VEGA
Gasoline by The Bouncing Souls
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOxc2cM75NI


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April 11, 2011, 02:29 PM

1 man and a well-groomed dude that's built like a GI Joe doll enter, one man leaves.

Sounds like Saturday night at Gem's place.


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April 11, 2011, 02:58 PM

The problem is men everywhere are having to make their own sandwiches nowadays!


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April 11, 2011, 03:11 PM

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The problem is men everywhere are having to make their own sandwiches nowadays!

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April 11, 2011, 03:15 PM



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