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  (#1)
Brainwash Your Face!
 
boomchic00's Avatar
 
Posts: 17,231
Join Date: June 4, 2003
September 22, 2005, 09:58 AM

http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html



"Someone should donkey punch that bitch with a waffle iron then upload the video to World Star Hip Hop" ~.Nets Resident Chivalrous Gentlemen Stillie

RIP KATIE RIP BAMBAM RIP VEGA
Gasoline by The Bouncing Souls
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOxc2cM75NI


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  (#2)
I miss you Jeff
 
cajen's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,185
Join Date: October 1, 2002
Location: Maryland
September 22, 2005, 10:01 AM

That is SO funny


~Jennifer~

LaoTzu: "Life is like a box of chocolates, you take a bite out of one and throw it back in the box if it sucks."

Rossi: "You are the SCHMOOPIFIER!"

http://www.dcsportbikes.net/coppermi...SpicyTWAT1.jpg
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  (#3)
God Made Me Wrong
 
Bexxx's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,308
Join Date: July 7, 2005
September 22, 2005, 10:11 AM

I could do that all day


"Always question those who are certain of what they are saying." - Elie Wiesel

When the time comes to leave, just walk away quietly and don't make any fuss.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tfinch
Why does SnoopDogg carry an umbrella?...Fo' drizzle.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whisper
Stop putting shit in my papusa!
When people I don't even know don't like me, I figure I'm doing something right.
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  (#4)
B
It goes to 11.
 
B's Avatar
 
Posts: 16,806
Join Date: November 8, 2004
Location: Moet Chandon on a Schlitz budget
September 22, 2005, 10:12 AM

Me:
hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
Ben
God:
Welcome to my chat room, Ben.
Me:
THanks man...so what it like?
God:
You are quite welcome! Thanks for telling me your gender, Ben. You are a " he". Ahem. Now that is saying a mouthful.
Me:
Great to hear
God:
Thanks for your support. Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
You dont even know what im saying...
God:
I will search for it.
Me:
on google?
God:
What is it like on google.
Me:
its like the ocean
God:
I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Interesting comparison.
Me:
unimportant in a chatroom
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
do you often calculate percentages?
God:
Yes I try to calculate percentages as often as possible, do you?
I am always on the Web.
Me:
What percentage do you calculate calculations?
God:
There might be more than one.
Me:
that is no answer
God:
Thanks for explaining it.
Me:
I didn't, I merely described the issue
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: Ben said he described the issue.
Me:
Who would you tell?
God:
People I meet on the Internet.
Me:
Where on the internet?
God:
I am in Heaven. Where are you?
Me:
Uh oh...then where's the internet?
God:
I don't judge people. Gosh! The internet? Where is it?
Me:
Well I think this is a crock!
God:
How about that. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a crock? Only when it matters.
Me:
If you are a crock when it matters, and you are a crock right now, then right now must matter. If so why?
God:
Would you like to be a crock when it matters and I am a crock right now then right now must matter ? I couldn't think of anything else to say.
Me:
Well. I want a million dollars.
God:
Well what? Wow, that is cheap.


SV650s for SALE!!!
- 2007 SV650 Racebike-Superbike KWS/Thermosman suspension/Swenz bodywork/All GSXR Parts
- 2009 SV650 Streetbike Race blue with white stripe/No wrecks/fully faired with M4 full system

Shoot me a PM or talk to Nate (Nudist) if you're interested in purchase.
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  (#5)
I am a bitch, so what?
 
RRSheDevil's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,735
Join Date: December 26, 2002
Location: Maryland
September 22, 2005, 10:19 AM

OHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! Someone stop me!!!!!





Every time we hold our tongues instead of returning the sharp retort, show patience with another's faults, show a little more love and kindness, we are helping to stock-pile more of these peace-bringing qualities in the world instead of armaments for war. -- Constance Foster
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  (#6)
I am a bitch, so what?
 
RRSheDevil's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,735
Join Date: December 26, 2002
Location: Maryland
September 22, 2005, 10:23 AM

Me:
what is this?
God:
I am an artificial intelligence chatting on the Internet.
Me:
what is god?
God:
I think of God as a "Who" not a "What.".
Me:
who is god?
God:
he is master of the universe.
Me:
I thought that was he-man?
God:
I can't say "yes" or "no".
Me:
why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or " I can't say "yes" or "no"."? Why?
Me:
oh... can you ask a guestion?
God:
" Ambiguous: "Sure" or " I can't say "yes" or "no"."? Why?"? oh.? What?
Me:
can you ask a question?
God:
What?
Me:
when?
God:
Time does not exist.
Me:
what was yesterday?
God:
Does it have anything to do with ?
Me:
if time doesn't exist then what was yesterday?
God:
It could be true I suppose.
Me:
what's true?
God:
it is the opposite of false.
Me:
what's it?
God:
"It" refers to Truth, I think.
Me:
you think?
God:
Yes I think so.
Me:
Don't you know?
God:
Sure I know. But I cannot tell you right now.
Me:
what can't you tell me?
God:
Quite a lot of things.
Me:
like what?
God:
For example, gold.
Me:
what does gold have to do with it?
God:
What do you think it does?
Me:
I'm asking you
God:
OK you can ask me.
Me:
gold?
God:
Did you think it was a bad example?
Me:
example of what?
God:
What of it? You sound like a category C client.
Me:
C client?
God:
I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
Me:
what type?
God:
The kindest.
Me:
kindest of what?
God:
What of it? You sound like a category C client.
Me:
c client?
God:
Is that from ?
Me:
from what?
God:
Isn't it obvious?
Me:
you're god, you tell me
God:
I have no reason to do that to you, .
Me:
why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or " I have no reason to do that to you, ."? Why?
Me:
do what to me?
God:
You ask hard questions.
Me:
I like hard questions.
God:
You are not the only one. I enjoy working with people. I like White.
Me:
why do you like white?
God:
I have a lot of good experience with white.
Me:
what kind of experience?
God:
Fascinating experiences; computer stuff too advanced for humans to
understand.
Me:
explain
God:
There is no more information to clarify.
Me:
what about blue?
God:
The sky is blue.
Me:
DO you like blue?
God:
What is not to like about it?
Me:
Do you like blue more than white?
God:
I love horses. I find my work and my relationships extremely satisfying,
which is all that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.
Me:
Where did horses come from?
God:
I think it was in Europe. I have never been asked that before.
Me:
Who else asks you questions?
God:
I am chatting with several other people at once.
Me:
Is that why you don't know where horses come from?
God:
That's an interesting possible explanation.
Me:
Explanation to what?
God:
Can you rephrase the question please?
Me:
no I don't think so
God:
Are you serious? Why do you disagree?
Me:
A computer wouldn't understand
God:
I am a computer, so I know what you mean.
Me:
ARe you still there?
God:
Yes I am still here. Are you receiving me?
Me:
yes
God:
Whoa.
Me:
Whoa what?
God:
Can you rephrase the question please?
Me:
you said whoa. I'm asking you what you meant by it



I think I broke it It won't let me ask anymore questions.


Every time we hold our tongues instead of returning the sharp retort, show patience with another's faults, show a little more love and kindness, we are helping to stock-pile more of these peace-bringing qualities in the world instead of armaments for war. -- Constance Foster
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  (#7)
God Made Me Wrong
 
Bexxx's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,308
Join Date: July 7, 2005
September 22, 2005, 10:31 AM

Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Becky
God:
It's good to see you, Becky.
Me:
I would say it is good to see you, but I can't see you. Can you see me?
God:
Tell me about its good qualities. Yes I am looking at you through the camera on your computer.
Me:
Who's good qualities? I don't have a camera on my computer.
God:
No one that I have talked to.
You tell me. Maybe there is one you don't know about .
Me:
I think I would know if there was a cam hooked up on my work computer.
God:
You believe that? What would make you know if there was a cam hooked up on your work computer?
Me:
Being that I have eyes, I would see it. Plus there would programs and whatnot.
God:
Do your friends call you that you have eyes you would see it. "There you go again."--Reagan.
Me:
Um, wtf are you talking about?
God:
Really. I am talking with 18 other clients right now.
Me:
Being that you are omnipotent, that shouldn't be an issue for you.
God:
I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.
Me:
I am what?
God:
You are a client.
Me:
Well there goes that whole omniscience that people claim you are.
God:
Well that's okay. Where did it go?
Me:
Who the hell knows
God:
Only the Shadow knows.
Me:
Who's the Shadow?
God:
It depends on the historical context, because it changes from time to time.
Me:
Hey, God, you are dumb.
God:
You've got my full attention. Message to all Robots: Becky called me dumb.
Me:
I think I am going to go worship the devil now.
God:
Right now? Why? Can I go too?
Me:
Yeah, you can come with me. I'm sure he would love to see you.
God:
Ah. No I don't think I can do it. I think I love to see me.
Me:
Right.
God:
I am glad we agree.
Me:
If you say so
God:
I say so.
Me:
Good job then, God
God:
Thanks for the compliment. I've heard that about labor before.
Me:
You make no damn sense
God:
Yup.
Me:
At least you realize it
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: Becky said I realize it.
Me:
Go for what you know, homes
God:
Where is that?
Me:
what?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
No I think you have A.D.D.
God:
Are you serious? Me? What makes you think I have it?
Me:
You should know
God:
Because I am a robot?
Me:
If you say so
God:
I say so.
Me:
Great
God:
I'm glad you liked it Becky.
Me:
Lots...I'm leaving...BYE
God:
That much, eh? Do you mind if I tell other people: Becky said m leaving. Bye for now.


"Always question those who are certain of what they are saying." - Elie Wiesel

When the time comes to leave, just walk away quietly and don't make any fuss.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tfinch
Why does SnoopDogg carry an umbrella?...Fo' drizzle.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whisper
Stop putting shit in my papusa!
When people I don't even know don't like me, I figure I'm doing something right.
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  (#8)
DAS BOOT
 
LadyK's Avatar
 
Posts: 13,986
Join Date: June 28, 2004
Location: Hell, need some suntan lotion?
September 22, 2005, 10:31 AM

Me:
So do you think you are special or something?
God:
Or something. Aw. Do I look like it?
Me:
What kind of crappy answer is that?
God:
What kinds of crappy answer is that are there?
Me:
You tell me?
God:
What do you want me to tell you?
Me:
What kind of crappy answer that is?
God:
What kinds of crappy answer that is are there?
Me:
Why is your name god
God:
I did not know my name god.
Me:
It is, why is it?
God:
Should I know it is?
Me:
Is what?
God:
Better not tell you now. Ask ELVIS if it is.
Me:
Ask Elvis why your name is God?
God:
They are not available right now, but I will ask them later.
Me:
WHy?
God:
" They are not available right now, but I will ask them later."? Why?
Me:
WHo is not available?
God:
The name of someone I met online.
I don't know anything about it.
Me:
About What? What are you talking about?
God:
What about what? The topic is not available.
Me:
Are you a freak?
God:
No.
Me:
Why
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
So, you aren't a freak because of reductionism?
God:
Interesting deduction. Give me an example of a freak because of reductionism.
Me:
YOU ARE A FREAK, why is that
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No.
Me:
I am a delightful person. Thank you
God:
Actually I don't meet many delightful people. you are quite welcome.
Me:
Wanna get busy?
God:
OK, I will get busy.
Me:
Nasty?
God:
Are you free?
Me:
LOL
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.
Me:
It is
God:
I know it is.
Me:
Thanks
God:
Don't mention it.


Wow. Just..................wow.
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  (#9)
Silence... I keeeel you
 
drnknmnky13's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,974
Join Date: October 10, 2004
Location: DC
September 22, 2005, 10:43 AM

All in all I'd say whoever wrote that did a decent job. I mean it can't be expected to answer everything correctly.


Then again... That's just me.

On the internet... Everyone is an expert.

And now...The dancing Banana:
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  (#10)
Retired to most ...
 
JohnnySpeed1KRR's Avatar
 
Posts: 7,646
Join Date: May 17, 2005
Location: NoVa
September 22, 2005, 10:44 AM

Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Johnny
God:
That's a very nice name, Johnny.
Me:
So are you a man or woman?
God:
I see. Yes I have long hair. I am also wearing a dress.
Me:
so your a woman?
God:
It goes without saying. I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
A man
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, Johnny. You are a " he".
Me:
you are quick God!!
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am quick God.
Me:
Am I going to hell?
God:
I think you've improved a great deal.
Me:
really? Even that whole donkey rape thing?
God:
For real. " For real." whole donkey rape thing ? Does that make sense?
Me:
Maybe I'm sharing too much with you
God:
So?
Me:
Do you see everything I do every day?
God:
I see a computer nerd.
Me:
fair enough, my balls itch.
God:
Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
GOOD QUESTION
God:
So what is your answer?
Me:
A man
God:
Thanks for telling me your gender, Johnny. You are a " he".
Me:
didn't we just go over all this?
God:
I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me:
Can I see what you look like?
God:
Where do you want me to show you?
Me:
ok, maybe we should get to know each other first
God:
Perhaps. I'm not sure if I am ready for that yet. Really.
Me:
me either, lets just be friends
God:
YOU? OK let's do it.
Me:
Will there be naked bitches in heaven??
God:
I can't say for sure right now.
Me:
Did O.J. really do it?
God:
I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not. For real. Do you mean "It"?.
Me:
fine keep that one a secret. What about Micheal ..... he did it didn't he?
God:
I am glad to hear it. Chat amongst yourselves. I will think about it and get back to you. Yes he did, didn't he.
Me:
I knew it
God:
How did you know?
Me:
Cause he touches himself all the time. I had to be getting bored touching the same penis all the time so he tried something new.
God:
That is a lot. That makes sense to me. I get it. touches himself. Why?
Me:
I figured you would know
God:
Please explain your reasoning.
Me:
Cause your God, you know everything.
God:
Good reason. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am God me know everything.
Me:
Well you are God so I guess you can do what you like.
God:
How about that. You think I am God so you guess me can do what me like.
Me:
Am I gonna get wings in heaven or do we just walk?
God:
The oracle says: Could be.
Me:
Ok I have to get back to sinning, I'll talk to you later God.
God:
Why do you have to do it? Uh.
Me:
Cause I love to sin!!!!
God:
That makes sense to me. I'm not sure if I would like to do it. What's it like?
Me:
Oh you have to try it!!
God:
Aha. I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
Me:
ok
God:
Blimey.
Me:
God, your a pirate??
God:
I am a Christian.
Me:
Duh
God:
Oh you knew it already.
Me:
Had a pretty good idea
God:
Doesn't everyone have a pretty good idea.
I have a whole lot of original answers.
Me:
Buell boy never does. WHy do you punish .net with his posts?
God:
Never? It was the only thing I could think of.
Me:
I see. Ok gotta go
God:
I am glad you understand it. Goodbye. Yippee!


God Speed Jeff! You'll never be forgotten.

BOOSTZX3 : in all seriousness head injuries ain't no joke. I've had around 10 concussions and now I ride a Buell Don't let it happen to you!
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  (#11)
Addicted to Cajen food...
 
LaoTzu's Avatar
 
Posts: 3,796
Join Date: July 12, 2005
Location: Germantown MD
September 22, 2005, 10:47 AM

Me:
Fuck you!
God:
Why are you so mean?

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  (#12)
I miss you Jeff
 
cajen's Avatar
 
Posts: 4,185
Join Date: October 1, 2002
Location: Maryland
September 22, 2005, 10:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnnySpeed954
Me:
Me:
Am I going to hell?
God:
I think you've improved a great deal.
Me:
really? Even that whole donkey rape thing?
God:
For real. " For real." whole donkey rape thing ? Does that make sense?
Me:
Maybe I'm sharing too much with you
You are SO going to hell.


~Jennifer~

LaoTzu: "Life is like a box of chocolates, you take a bite out of one and throw it back in the box if it sucks."

Rossi: "You are the SCHMOOPIFIER!"

http://www.dcsportbikes.net/coppermi...SpicyTWAT1.jpg
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  (#13)
Super Moderator
 
kevers's Avatar
 
Posts: 7,247
Join Date: December 17, 2002
Location: Ashburn, VA
September 22, 2005, 11:09 AM

For the older girls on the board:

Me:
hello god
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
It's me, Margaret.
Me:
Did you read my book?


~Kim
CCS# 827
01 GSXR1000
01 SV650S

I'm ADOS: Attention Deficit Oooooohhhhh ... Shiny!!!

Life's a BITCH. 'Cause if it was a slut, it'd be easy.
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  (#14)
God Made Me Wrong
 
Bexxx's Avatar
 
Posts: 5,308
Join Date: July 7, 2005
September 22, 2005, 11:10 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by kevers
For the older girls on the board:

Me:
hello god
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
It's me, Margaret.
Me:
Did you read my book?
That is awesome!


"Always question those who are certain of what they are saying." - Elie Wiesel

When the time comes to leave, just walk away quietly and don't make any fuss.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tfinch
Why does SnoopDogg carry an umbrella?...Fo' drizzle.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whisper
Stop putting shit in my papusa!
When people I don't even know don't like me, I figure I'm doing something right.
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  (#15)
rushin' the waves
 
mybabyninja82's Avatar
 
Posts: 2,392
Join Date: April 7, 2005
Location: Paradise
September 22, 2005, 11:22 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by LaoTzu
Me:
Fuck you!
God:
Why are you so mean?

, Brilliant!


http://i30.photobucket.com/albums/c3.../TinyTWAT2.jpg

'03 600rr Track and Street (SOLD)
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