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Quick & Dirty Domestic Legal Advise Needed
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Quick & Dirty Domestic Legal Advise Needed - January 3, 2013, 01:31 AM

Yeah yeah, I already know - tell him to get a lawyer. But in the meantime I have a friend who needs some quick and dirty guidance on how to proceed over the next two weeks or so while he screens suitable representation.

Short version:
His wife went to Florida with their son for a week over the holidays. They were supposed to come home Tuesday but she said she was delayed.

He walked in the house this tonight and the house was cleaned out. All of her items were gone, leaving behind a custody filing which was filed in DC on the 28th of Dec.

She refuses to let him see their son and will not tell him where they are. She is attempting to leverage him into a custody agreement pre-hearing and only communicating via text. He's not going for that. At all.

In essence she has abandoned the marriage and kidnapped their son.

What are his options? Should he file a police report? Can he press criminal charges?

Note: No abuse; spousal or child. No gambling or financial issues. The relationship was strained because he was putting in long hours at his self-owned business and attempting to build a suitable life for the three of them.

He had deep conflict with his mother-in-law leeching off him and sister-in-law/mother in law interjecting, telling him how to raise his family and run his house. Pussifying his son with new age eat kelp and tofu, no red meat, etc. etc.
(He's old testament. Ex-Wrestler, disciplinarian, and doesn't take shit from mother-in-laws, especially in his own home.)

They were in marriage counseling as recently as last month at her request, which he acquiesced to. What she did was a complete blind side and wholly unfair to him and their son.



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

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January 3, 2013, 05:57 AM

She did abandon him. Plus he now has all of her text messages. She's an idiot. If there is no claimed abuse now....and he's been trying this hard, then he just needs to get a lawyer to hammer her in court. It's not going to be pretty.

Make sure he shuts down any financial avenues she may have to undercut him. (Joint accounts to which she can gain access, credit cards, cash, etc)

Get a dirty lawyer asap. She isn't fighting fair. Neither should he at this point. No matter what, he's screwed. Why? Because he's a guy and it's divorce court. Rarely will it go his way. So be prepared. He can only limit the amount of damage at this point. Obviously the marriage is over. What is she trying to get him to sign off on for a custody agreement???


I want my baby back, baby back, baby back....Chileeeeee's bay back...
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January 3, 2013, 06:03 AM

Well you can't kidnap your own child unless there is some type of court order restricting your access to him or her for a limited time period. I would tell him to take money, cash, and stash it somewhere.

He needs to document EVERYTHING that has to deal with her at this point and save each and every text message.


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Originally Posted by The Patient View Post
Really Snipes? Thats how you get down??

I got $1000 on Snipes being the best at this shit!!

Who wanna put a stack up against that? Who the fuck is Snipes' competition?

That motherfucker through in some flat asses for 5150 then told him to stfu and enjoy!

Man Snipes is the Mike Jordan of this shit!!

This threads stock just rose like a SOB!
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January 3, 2013, 06:07 AM

Check with DC police to see if he can get a parental abduction warrant. Get the lawyers lined up and protect his assets.


How is a missing child defined? By law (specifically the 1982 Missing Children’s Act), it’s any person younger than 18 whose whereabouts are unknown to his or her legal custodian. Under the act, the circumstances surrounding the disappearance must indicate that the child was removed from the control of his or her legal custodian without the custodian's consent, or the circumstances of the case must strongly indicate that the child is likely to have been abused or sexually exploited.

FBI — Family Abductions
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January 3, 2013, 06:12 AM

Take a look over on the wera.com BBS. Do a search for this topic. Tons of stories and good advice. (Which boils down to cover your ass. Cover your financials. Understand that she will try to play on your emotions, get you to do or sign things...make promises, etc. Anything to make you look bad in court and pull money from your wallet.)

If he owns a business and has been working hard to keep it going. Expect that to be a target as well. She will go for half or it I would guess. Then she will also go for alimony and child support. Her lawyer will recommend she go for full custody. It will increase her child support payments. (And more fighting = more money for the lawyer.) This will get expensive quickly. Drain the personal and joint bank accounts. Go to a different bank, open new ones. Otherwise she can try to access them as your wife.


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January 3, 2013, 07:19 AM

He should start reading this:

THE LIST (Print It) - Divorce Forum and Child Custody Forum

This is a great forum for Dad's trying to retain custody in a divorce.


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January 3, 2013, 09:55 AM

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Originally Posted by MudDawg View Post
What is she trying to get him to sign off on for a custody agreement???
She filed for full custody according to the paperwork.

He's concerned because although she works as well, her family could lend the most assistance. She has 3 sisters, a brother and a mother who does not work (he was paying her for daycare services and bought her a fucking used Lexus to get around in since she had no reliable transportation) who all live within an hour's drive.

Most of his immediate family lives in Delaware.

Here's how wicked this little cunt is. He found out this was supposed to happen over the holidays! The Florida family visit/trip was a bit of a rouse.

He was supposed to accompany them on the Florida family visit. This bitch was going to have her brother and one of her sister's husband move everything out while they were in Florida and he would have returned to an empty home. Completely cleaned out.

That plan went awry because he had some issues at work he needed to attend to and did not make the trip. In turn she made it a smash, grab and dash job. He can tell everything was rushed out the house. Walls nicked and damaged. Wires pulled out. Scratches on the floor. Drawers left open. etc.



Quote:
Originally Posted by MPSniper View Post
Well you can't kidnap your own child unless there is some type of court order restricting your access to him or her for a limited time period. I would tell him to take money, cash, and stash it somewhere.

He needs to document EVERYTHING that has to deal with her at this point and save each and every text message.
I've told him this. Drain all joint accounts - document and save everything. No recorded phone conversations if she's in Maryland. (Dual Party Consent Law).

Quote:
Originally Posted by Quasimoto View Post
Check with DC police to see if he can get a parental abduction warrant. Get the lawyers lined up and protect his assets.


How is a missing child defined? By law (specifically the 1982 Missing Children’s Act), it’s any person younger than 18 whose whereabouts are unknown to his or her legal custodian. Under the act, the circumstances surrounding the disappearance must indicate that the child was removed from the control of his or her legal custodian without the custodian's consent, or the circumstances of the case must strongly indicate that the child is likely to have been abused or sexually exploited.

FBI — Family Abductions
Will pass this along.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Todd View Post
He should start reading this:

THE LIST (Print It) - Divorce Forum and Child Custody Forum

This is a great forum for Dad's trying to retain custody in a divorce.
Thanks.



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

- Nicolo Machiavelli 1469-1527

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January 3, 2013, 10:17 AM

guy should not have married a fru fru bitch in the first place. Drain all accounts for sure tho. It likely has been done by the mom tho. Sounds like the kid is pussified already and may just be a write off at this point.
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January 3, 2013, 10:20 AM

Aaand this is why I don't get married


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January 3, 2013, 10:54 AM

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Aaand this is why I don't get married
At this point, I don't think marriage is the main issue. He's a cut and dry guy. In his words, "Heist, you can't keep a woman that doesn't want to be kept."

For him its solely about a relationship with their son. This is the "miracle' baby."

His first son, with another woman, was born premature and died a few weeks after birth.

The second time, with his wife, was an early mid-term miscarriage. They found out she
had a blood condition and her body attacked the fetus as if it was a foreign body.
She spent 3-4 months in a depressive and an emotionally unstable state. He had to deal with it, every day, including the prolonged lack of intimacy.

This third time, after careful preparation and an expensive regime of drugs and supplements, they finally delivered successfully - but then came 6 months of post-partum depression, body image issues, emotional swings and lack of intimacy.

He has paid for the right to have access to his son in more ways than one.



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

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January 3, 2013, 11:06 AM

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guy should not have married a fru fru bitch in the first place. Drain all accounts for sure tho. It likely has been done by the mom tho. Sounds like the kid is pussified already and may just be a write off at this point.
She wasn't fru fru to start. Maybe a few fru'ish traits but generally down to earth. Good mind. Masters from John's Hopkins. I thought it would good match because they balance each other's weaker character flaws. He's a somewhat gruff realist. She managed to polish up some of his rougher edges and improve his social graces. He'll never win a Congeniality or Diplomacy Contest but even I have seen the change.

But her mother, I knew she was a bit of a loon - artistic, bohemian type. Her daughter started out normal, but after the kid came 2 years ago she began exerting greater and greater influence on the family and more specifically on her daughter.

It was the first grandchild for her and she kept injecting her new age nuttiness. He tolerated some of it because he did not want his son to have a closed mind and felt it was good to have him grow up with a broader life perspective than what he was raised with.

But it was becoming too much - too overbearing. Too liberal. Too influential. He started drawing some distinct lines in the sand in the house and it was becoming a source of contention when his wife would take up sides with her mother.



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

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January 3, 2013, 11:29 AM

This is a game of chess and he is already 3 moves down. He needs a good lawyer now. He needs to write everything down and i mean everything. If he can record anything legally then do it. He must not attempt to kidnap the kid back. He must do it legally. He must not ever meet his soon to be x alone!!!! Meet her in public in a place that has cameras!!!!


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January 3, 2013, 11:30 AM

draining the bank accounts or trying to take the kids is a bad idea.

lol.


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January 3, 2013, 11:34 AM

Quote:
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draining the bank accounts or trying to take the kids is a bad idea.

lol.
oh you can drain the bank accounts. That is what my ex did to me and then tried to sue me for the money she took.


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January 3, 2013, 11:44 AM

Quote:
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This is a game of chess and he is already 3 moves down. He needs a good lawyer now. He needs to write everything down and i mean everything. If he can record anything legally then do it. He must not attempt to kidnap the kid back. He must do it legally. He must not ever meet his soon to be x alone!!!! Meet her in public in a place that has cameras!!!!
I advised him of that.
That's why I spent 2 hours on the phone with him last night. He was about to go all Liam Neison "Taken" last night and start kicking in doors and slapping family members around until someone told him the location of his son.

And I advised, right now, she's in the wrong. Do not put yourself in a precarious and legally exposed situation. Handle it through Sheriffs, Mediators, and Courts.

No more meeting at the house. Meet at McDonalds or Starbucks.
The good thing is his house is in NJ. The one they have here is rented. I told him to call the landlord and have them rescind the old lease effective the day she moved out. Write up a new lease with him as the sole lessee and change the locks.



“Any man who tries to be good all the time is bound to come to ruin among the great number who are not good. Hence a Prince who wants to keep his authority must learn how not to be good, and use that knowledge, or refrain from using it, as necessity requires”.

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