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Stupid/funny questions about bikes you've gotten or given
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Stupid/funny questions about bikes you've gotten or given - May 29, 2013, 03:28 PM

Let's face it, most of us weren't born with the ability to differentiate an R6 from a 600RR.
So at the beginning or any time there after we may be faced with a stupid
question or asked a stupid question. This thread is for stupid questions/funny
questions we have gotten or given to others regarding any bike.

My super stupid question I asked one time
Before I knew anything about bikes I had met my lady who is now my wife.
She rode before I ever sat on a bike and I was excited to sit on a bike.
So we went by her house and she pulled out her little Ninja 250 and allowed
me to sit on it. She and her mother were standing there watching me sit on it and get comfy.
As i'm fiddling with the bike I went to pull the front brake and clutch.
Then I was stunned when I pulled the alleged left brake handle bar lever and it
didn't feel like the right brake lever. In my uninformed bike noobiness I blurted
out "Your left brake lever doesn't work!" They both immediately started
laughing and telling me it's the clutch. Moreover it's been like 5 years since my
stupid little comment and they still poke fun at me for thinking her clutch was
a brake. Needless to say I was incapable of riding the bike but enjoyed sitting
on it and making a fool of myself.

What about you all, what stupid stuff have you asked or been asked?


2001 Kawasaki ZX6R: Yoshi slip-on
1999 Trans AM WS6, Long tubes, full exhaust, extra sexy
2006 GTO 6spd, 1 of 390 Silver, SLP LM1 (Sold)
2001 R1; blue, Yoshi slip on (sold Jan 12, 2012)
(RIP) 2000 Camaro SS
1999 Trans Am Ws6 30k miles, 6spd (sold)
1999 Camaro coupe 6 cyl (traded in after a week to get the SS)
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Stop light racer...
 
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Posts: 1,245
Join Date: May 30, 2012
Location: A Fjord in Norway
May 29, 2013, 04:40 PM

When I went to buy my first bike -a 1981 Honda sold by Spanish guy off Craigslist- I had never even sat on a motorcycle before. The guy handed me the keys, which I then stuck into the ignition and turned -like you would in a car- and nothing happened. I looked at the guy with a confused look and said "it doesn't start?" He -looking equally confused- said in poor English "you ride motorcycle?"

I bought this bike and later that night i learned to ride it -with no helmet, gloves, registration, or insurance- using tips i learned from some Youtube videos.

Oh, it's been a great learning experience, that's for sure ... Here's to motorcycles, the best toys ever!


- Norway Daily, 90' VFR750, V4 Touring Beast
- USA Daily, 08' Versys - Urban Assault vehicle
- Toy, 02' Ducati 900ss - Loud and angry noises
- Toy, 89' FZR600 - Raw Inline Deathbox
- Project, 91' CB250 - Goal: lightweight city bike
- Project, 79' CB350 - Finally runs, now to finish

- Sold, Red 94' VS800 - Loud as F@*$
* R.I.P. Blue 06' SV650, murdered by DC!
* R.I.P. Black 98' FZR600, murdered by DC!
- Sold, Red 81' GS650
- Sold, Black 81' CM400T

Last edited by pnbell; May 30, 2013 at 09:16 AM..
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Location: Frederick County, MD
May 29, 2013, 05:06 PM

When I first started riding a bike with a clutch I essentially taught myself (my brother said something about 1 down, and 3 up but I didn't really get it). As I went along I just kept pulling in the clutch and pushing up on the shifter. I don't know how long I did that before I realized that when the engine noise didn't keep changing on each gear shift that I was already in top gear. I was like 10 years old but it still seems kind of dumb.

When we got a cr80r I was afraid of it going into the powerband. Like a lot of folks I thought the powerband was an actual part on the bike, kind of like a turbo. Don't push the red button, that turns on the powerband!!!
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May 29, 2013, 05:16 PM

Wasn't a question but I went with a member on here to purchase a track bike from a supposedly well known track day rider a few months ago. While the seller is trying to start the bike, I suggest jumping it off his truck after bumping it didn't work. He said we couldn't do that because the bike (a GSXR) was a 6V system.

Then after exchanging funds and loading the bike up, he mentioned that the chain needed to be adjusted because due to the cold, it had stretched.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Fitz View Post
My wife wants to get LASIK or a boob job

She asked my opinion

I told her I have no vested interest in making her eyesight better
Quote:
Originally Posted by alex View Post
Im not really fast enough to notice a difference between tires. I buy the kind thats black and made out of rubber.
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Knee Draggin!
 
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May 29, 2013, 05:32 PM

Not about me, but I heard a story about a girl who's bike kept overheating.

A guy went to look at it and it looked fine. He went on a ride alongside her, and noticed that she never shifted out of first gear.


Nothing I say is to be taken seriously.

2004 Black ZX636
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Join Date: December 15, 2010
Location: Alexandria, VA
May 29, 2013, 05:40 PM

Back in Italy when I was working in a motorcycle shop a customer came in complaining that for some reason his vintage CB750 would perform very differently depending on if he had his gloves on or not. We thought there was some weird discharging happening when he was touching the metal levers with the gloves off. After hours of tinkering tirns out the moron would tale off the gloves and stuff them in the airbox intake for storage when not wearing them effectively chocking the engine.

Same place, a guy showed up with his Ducati Paso 907 stating that his clutch was slipping under hard accelleration. Turns out that in over 20k miles he never replaces the front sprocket that in time had become almost flush so any amount of torque over 20% throttle opening made it simply spin and not engage the chain...

A 15 y/o girl came in stating her front brake on her scooter was making funny noises and wasn't braking at all at this point. She had run through all the breaking material, kept braking on the metallic part of the brake pad, kept going, piercing a round hole on it, braking on the caliper pistons. She stopped only when one of the pistons fell out of the caliper itself.... LOL

And I had a customer ask me if the bike was front wheel drive or rear wheel drive... True story...


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May 29, 2013, 06:27 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by CrookedKing View Post
Not about me, but I heard a story about a girl who's bike kept overheating.

A guy went to look at it and it looked fine. He went on a ride alongside her, and noticed that she never shifted out of first gear.
derp lol MSF would have helped


2001 Kawasaki ZX6R: Yoshi slip-on
1999 Trans AM WS6, Long tubes, full exhaust, extra sexy
2006 GTO 6spd, 1 of 390 Silver, SLP LM1 (Sold)
2001 R1; blue, Yoshi slip on (sold Jan 12, 2012)
(RIP) 2000 Camaro SS
1999 Trans Am Ws6 30k miles, 6spd (sold)
1999 Camaro coupe 6 cyl (traded in after a week to get the SS)
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May 29, 2013, 08:00 PM

I worked at a bike shop in college. The number of times I heard comments about "Don't use the front brake, you'll flip" are too numerous to count. Every once in a while somebody would actually admit to now knowing much, then ask questions and pay attention.

Yeah, it took all of 2 months before I was the 2nd highest selling parts guy. And I was only part time. Answer nicely, try to impart some knowledge, and sell good safety gear.


I want my baby back, baby back, baby back....Chileeeeee's bay back...
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watch this!...
 
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May 29, 2013, 08:30 PM

at a shop in hawaii we had to put a note on every bike that got new tire/s. guy come to get his bike and rips it off and i was like hey seriously those tires are gonna be slick so take it easy for a little while. he responds, dude i've been riding for a long time, i got it. as he pulls out of the lot he spun the rear all the way around we hear the rev limiter as he low sides. couldnt help but laugh when he got up as i was coming to help and he said, man that tire is slick.
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TNT
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May 29, 2013, 09:40 PM

I recently got new tires put on and forgot to take the stickers off them before doing a few laps around the neighborhood on/off ramps to scrub them in.
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May 29, 2013, 10:20 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by TNT View Post
I recently got new tires put on and forgot to take the stickers off them before doing a few laps around the neighborhood on/off ramps to scrub them in.
I haven't bought new tires in a couple years but I never took the stickers off. Didn't really affect traction much since I took it easy for the first few miles anyway and they were gone before I had to worry about traction.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Fitz View Post
My wife wants to get LASIK or a boob job

She asked my opinion

I told her I have no vested interest in making her eyesight better
Quote:
Originally Posted by alex View Post
Im not really fast enough to notice a difference between tires. I buy the kind thats black and made out of rubber.

Last edited by RileysDad; May 29, 2013 at 10:29 PM..
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May 30, 2013, 05:36 AM

I make sure all my bikes have traction control now.
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May 30, 2013, 06:45 AM

The first day I bought my R6, my friend rode it back home for me. He was going over some basic controls with me, front brake, clutch, rear brake, throttle, then he goes "OK so to put the bike in reverse..."

Almost had me, almost.
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May 30, 2013, 07:52 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by coolkhas View Post
The first day I bought my R6, my friend rode it back home for me. He was going over some basic controls with me, front brake, clutch, rear brake, throttle, then he goes "OK so to put the bike in reverse..."

Almost had me, almost.
Inspection guys try this with me all the time.


You can live in your car, but you can't race your house.

'07 ZX-10R - 156 RWHP/182 MPH
'09 KX450F - VCHSS 29F
'85 ZL-900 Eliminator
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a6Jpc...eature=related
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The difference between men and boys is that boys make excuses and men make changes.
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whoa preppy......
 
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May 30, 2013, 08:02 AM

I had an Aprilia CapoNord back in 02-03. I was filling it up when a guy approached me and asked what kind of bike it was..I said: "It's an Aprilia". He follows up with...who makes it? I replied, "Aprilia". Like I was deaf or hard of hearing...he says loudly...NO WHO MAKES IT?


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